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Leta Blake

author. human. working hard to become stellar at life.

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      • Entrainement
        • Saison d’entrainement
        • Centre d’entrainement
        • Entraînement: Intégrale
      • Tenebris
        • Une passion indéniable
        • Les regrets du passé
      • Passion
        • La montée de la passion: Passion #1
        • La passion de l’Alpha: Passion #2
        • Une passion amère: Passion #3
      • Se réveiller mariés
        • Will & Patrick (se réveiller mariés : épisode 1)
        • Will & Patrick rencontrent la famille ( se réveiller mariés : épisode 2)
        • Will & Patrick traversent les fêtes ( se réveiller mariés : épisode 3)
        • Will & Patrick combattent leurs sentiments ( se réveiller mariés : épisode 4)
        • Will & Patrick rencontrent la mafia: se réveiller mariés #5
        • La fin heureuse de Will & Patrick: se réveiller mariés #6
        • La lune de miel de Will & Patrick: Se réveiller mariés #7
        • Se réveiller mariés épisode 1 à 3: W & P
        • Se réveiller mariés épisode 4 à 6: W & P
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        • Lévitation: un conte de fées gay
        • Envol : un conte de fées gay
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        • La leggerezza del principe
        • Rise: Una favola gay
      • ’90s Coming of Age – Versione italiana
        • Ritratti Di Te (’90s Coming of Age Vol. 1)
        • Tu non sei me (’90s Coming of Age Vol. 2)
        • Solo tu (’90s Coming of Age Vol. 3)
        • La mia pelle implora il tuo tocco (’90s Coming of Age Vol. 4)
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      • Home for the Holidays – Versione italiana
        • Cuore di ghiaccio (Home for the Holidays Vol. 1)
        • La lista dei cattivi (Home for the Holidays Vol.2)
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      • La stagione dell’allenamento
        • Training Season: La stagione dell’allenamento
        • Training Complex: Il complesso dell’allenatore
      • Svegliarsi sposati
        • Svegliarsi sposati (Wake Up Married Vol. 1)
        • Svegliarsi sposati 2 & 3: Will e Patrick incontrano la famiglia (Wake Up Married 2 & 3)
        • Svegliarsi sposati 4 & 5: Will e Patrick combattono i loro sentimenti – Will e Patrick incontrano la mafia (Wake Up Married 4& 5)
        • Svegliarsi sposati: Il lieto fine di Will e Patrick – La luna di miele infinita di Will e Patrick (Vol 6 & 7) (Wake up married)
    • German
      • Die einbändige
        • Auch in diesem Leben
        • Das Herz findet immer einen Weg
        • Mr Frosty Pants (German)
        • Mr. Naughty List (German)
        • Mein Dezember Daddy
        • Smoky Mountain Dreams – Deutsche Version
        • Cowboy Sucht Ehemann
        • Stay Lucky– Deutsche
        • Vespertine: Der Priester und der Rockstar
      • In der Hitze der Liebe
        • Langsame Hitze
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        • Langsame Geburt
        • Bittere Hitze
      • Training Season – Deutsche Version
        • Training Season – Deutsche
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      • Liebe ohne Halt
        • Free Fall: Liebe ohne Halt
      • Überraschend … verheiratet!
        • Überraschend … verheiratet! (Wake up Married 1)
        • Überraschend … verliebt! (Wake up Married 2)
        • Will & Patrick: Endlose Flitterwochen: Wake up Married Bonusstory
      • Heat for Sale – Deutsche
        • Heat for Sale – Deutsche
        • Alpha For Sale: Ned und Ezer
      • Newsletter
    • Spanish
      • Sueños en las Montañas Humeantes
  • About

Leta

A Love Story

May 30, 2013 by Leta

white roses flowers wallpapers (4)

This story was published in the beginning of our Marriage Service pamphlet which my daughter unearthed recently from a box in my closet. She was captivated by it because it is the story of her parents, not because it is a truly captivating read. If anything, it’s charming and sweet–which probably explains a lot about me.

A Love Story

Once upon a time, there was a boy and he had his eye on a girl. One morning he bravely handed her a white rose on the school bus. Seven years later, when he asked her to marry him, he again gave her a white rose. So today, on their wedding day, the girl carries white roses in honor of this history.

***

We started dating at 14 and 16, and basically it was this from the beginning:

I’m gonna marry you.
Plan your life accordingly.

It was a good choice. We were smart cookies.

So, yes, we were high school sweethearts who, against all odds, were actually right for each other. We’ve been married now for fifteen years this May and have been together for twenty-four years this past November. There were some hitches in there, some break ups, and some bad times, but we’ve always come out the other side together.

May we be lucky enough to always continue coming out the other side of whatever we face in the future still together and still in love.

Happy Anniversary to us!

Filed Under: Marriage Tagged With: 14 and 16, a love story, anniversary, marriage, white roses

8 – Twenty-Five Things Tuesday – Never Have to Use My Professional Licenses Again

May 28, 2013 by Leta

officespaceYes, for my day job, I have to have some snazzy professional licenses. I want to find a way to never, ever, ever have to use these licenses again. I give myself ten years to accomplish that.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

The News Is Bad For You. This Picture Is Not.

May 27, 2013 by Leta

This picture does not go with this post. It doesn't matter. Just look at that. Unf. Hotness, says I.
This picture does not go with this post. It doesn’t matter. Just look at that. Unf. Hotness, says I.

News is bad for you. 

I stopped watching almost all televised news when I was pregnant with my daughter and haven’t regretted it. I’d like to be exposed to even less news, actually, if I could. I believe that being informed up to the point that I can actually do something about a situation is what’s important. Everything else is bad for me, bad for us, and prevents people from making a constructive difference in the world because they’re too busy reacting to things they can’t control. Not even a little bit.

What you can do is go on with your life, be kind to those around you, even those who annoy, go forth with compassion and a renewed knowledge that every person you meet is a flesh and blood human being who would cling to you and/or help you if the worst happened, and build connections of love.

*climbs down from anti-news soap box*

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Vacation Must End

May 23, 2013 by Leta

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Beach, sunset, vacation

Vacation All I Ever Wanted

May 22, 2013 by Leta

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Beach, vacation

7 – Twenty Five Things Tuesday: Get Drunk In Front of this Mural Again

May 21, 2013 by Leta

First, on the list of things I apparently will never do again in my life–which, ha, really should be a whole other set of posts, because there are plenty of things I’ll never do again–I will apparently (and sadly) never be able to sit in the bar of the Palace Hotel in San Francisco and get deliciously drunk while staring at this picture over the bar.

Parrish
The Pied Piper by Maxfield Parrish at The Palace Hotel.

The Palace Hotel has removed the icon from it’s place over the bar. To quote: The hotel said the painting was being sold because “it is no longer practical for the hotel to display, an original work of this value and cultural signifcance, in a public area.”

Wait, wait, wait! Hold the presses! As I was searching for the picture to go with the above, I found out that there was such public outcry that the hotel has decided not to sell the painting after all. Awesome news!!! I sure hope they put it back where it was. Getting drunk while staring at that painting is one of my fondest memories. So fond, I did it twice and had decided it would be worth the migraine to do it a third time.

Click to see the bigger file. No photo can truly capture it, though.
Click to see the bigger file. No photo can truly capture it, though.

So, I officially change this post back to the original topic of Twenty Five Things I want to do/accomplish before my eventual (hopefully far away) death. I want to get drunk staring at this mural again. Preferably in the Palace Hotel in the company of my husband and my dear, dear friend. The same dear friend my husband and I got drunk with the first two times, because, God, I haven’t seen her in forever. Heh. That should be another post in this series. It could be a series of posts. Friends I want to see again before I die (with my death being, hopefully, a long time from now, and the seeing their faces a short time from now).

Regardless! Thing Seven! Get drunk in front of the Pied Piper! Again!

Filed Under: Art, Hotels, Wishes Tagged With: hotels, maxfield parrish, palace keeps pied piper, palace removes pied piper, san francisco, the palace hotel, the palace hotel san francisco, the pied piper, to do before I die, twenty five things to do before death, wishes

In My Blood Like Holy Wine

May 20, 2013 by Leta

caseofyou

 

As a writer, there is no doubt that parts of people I’ve loved, if only momentarily, pours out of me in the lines that come out of my fingers.

The other day, I wrote a line in my most recent work in progress about a woman’s ankles. It was written instinctively, it came out of the character’s mouth as easily as breath, and yet my mind went back to a woman who taught British Literature when I was in college. I no longer remember her name or her face, but I remember her captivating ankles. If I had been gay or a straight man, I’d have attempted a move on her due to her ankles alone. Most of her has vanished from my  memory, but a part of her poured from my soul in the moment I wrote the lines for my character. She touched me. Or her ankles did.

This is a superficial example. I have characters who suddenly spout off a version of my father’s position in our last argument, or my good friend’s confession about her desire for babies, or start to eat pepperoni slices out of a massive bag a la The Pepperoni Lady at my prior job.

If I know you, if I’ve loved you, part of you will pour out of me in these lines from time to time. When and where and what there is no telling or any way to plan, but it will be happen. Because you live in me, some part of you, forever.

Filed Under: Friends, Music, Video Tagged With: ankles, love is touching souls, part of you pours out of me, writing

6 – Twenty Five Things Tuesday: South of France

May 14, 2013 by Leta

So, most of these are probably going to consist of travel wishes, I realize. I mean, I’m almost forty and haven’t left North America! I’ve had plans to do so several times, but then things happened, as they do, and the plans fell through.

But, yes, one day, before I die, I’d like to vacation in the South of France. And any of these villas will do for a place to stay. I’m not too picky. Heh.

sofrance

Filed Under: Travel, Wishes Tagged With: south of france, twenty five things to do before death

Sex Research

May 13, 2013 by Leta

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I have read some very bizarre (though interesting) sex blog/advice today while researching some sex scenes. I figured I’d share the goods with you.

1. This one is a straight guy talking about how if you want to really get a lady hot for you, then you should NEVER have an orgasm the first time you have sex with her, and maybe not even the second because then she will be very aware that you did not come and want to work that much harder next time to get you to orgasm.

As a woman, I find this advice very bizarre. If I had sex with a man and he didn’t orgasm, I admit–fair or not–it’d be a pretty big blow to my self-esteem. (Which, given that the link above is to the Pick-Up Artist site, which is all about neg hits, is probably what they are going for. But, uh, at what cost? Dude, do you really want to pass up an orgasm on the chance that by not coming she’s gonna wanna hit that again in hopes of proving she’s got what it takes to make you shoot? Really?) And I’d most likely not want to have sex with the guy again unless I was already in a relationship with him and I felt like it was just an off night for some reason. If it was a first time sex act, I’d be convinced I wasn’t his cuppa and probably just really want to have sex with someone else who did get off with me so I’d feel like I wasn’t somehow awful in bed. [BTW, not everything in that guy’s post is a bad idea. *cough* Okay? Okay. And, yes, I will see a therapist pronto about my sexual hang-ups and insecurities, thank you for your concern.]

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Or so Power Bottom explains to us at length in his lovely post.

2. This post is written by a male power bottom, and while I found all of his descriptions of and information about anal sex from his point of view very helpful and informative, I found his comments about why anal sex is better than vaginal sex pretty amusing. I am quite sure that for some men anal is better than vaginal. I’m also quite sure, based on the last, oh, ten years of sex research on the internet, that for some men vaginal is better. And some men like both pretty equally just for different occasions. And some men are gay and don’t want anal at all! And some men are straight and despite having access to a workable anus if they wanted, also don’t want anal at all! It was just kinda amusing to see this guy basically be like, “Oh, yeah, all you guys who like girl parts, you are so wrong and should really come fuck me now, okay?” I am sure some bisexual guys will happily take him up on it and some will happily tell him that, yes, his ass is much better than their ex-girlfriend’s vagina. And other guys are just gonna stick with what they like, aka girl parts, and never take him up on his suggestions. And that’s okay!

3. And this man describes in detail what it feels like to fuck a girl. Also, to the author of two above, he mentions that while he likes fucking ass, he prefers the vagina. Some men just do, okay? Don’t worry, though, Power Bottom, plenty of guys will happily fuck your butt, I’m sure. Anyway, it’s an interesting description. Might as well read it.

Filed Under: Sex Tagged With: anal sex, don't orgasm the first time, fucking a man, fucking a woman, gay sex is best., neg hit, power bottom, sex is like pizza, sex research, the pick-up artist, vaginal sex, which is better anal or vaginal sex

Welcome to the Inspiration for My Latest Story

May 10, 2013 by Leta

1. [youtube=http://youtu.be/kVN2b0DdZAQ]

2. [youtube=http://youtu.be/xTYp2akeH6s]

3. andrej%20pejic

And that’s the potion for the new spell, baby.

Filed Under: Music, Photos, writing Tagged With: andrej pejic, dar williams, dashboard confessional, hands down, inspiration, when i was a boy

More Barebacking Research

May 9, 2013 by Leta

Marineros Locos, 26” x 36”, oil on paper, 2009
by Boris Torres

Just as Catholic couples (are obliged to) relish the divinely-ordained undertaking of procreative sex, barebackers revel in “the rapture of unencumbered fucking.”[23] As one barebacker relates:

Feeling a man’s dick inside me, condomless—that’s when the sex becomes spiritual in its intensity. Communion, in the truest sense. Integral to that closeness is the knowledge that he intends to leave a piece of himself inside me; his cum, like the sex itself, has a psychological value far beyond anything physical. — Unlimited Intimacies

***

However, Dean’s greater sin rests in his reluctance to unpack the religious dimensions of his reflections with any depth, despite having made liberal use of terms laden with religious connotation. In his oversight, he leaves perhaps the most intriguing implications of his work unexplored and uninterrogated—namely, that a sexually-charged subculture might inadvertently or ironically rearticulate the established practices of mainstream institutions like the Catholic Church.  Dean fails to entertain the dual possibilities that ritualizing raw sex might reroute sacred energies for perverse purposes or —more bleakly—that it might reduce condomless fucking to a sacralized script. Our cursory analyses have initiated only the briefest responses to the questions posed by such a comparison. In place of a decisive conclusion, we uncover an ethical charge. — Unlimited Intimacies: Promiscuous Reflections on Barebacking and Catholic Dogma

Filed Under: Sex Tagged With: barebacking, catholic dogma, fear, gay sex, research, sex, unlimited intimacies

5 – Twenty Five Things Tuesday: Follow My Ears With Feet

May 7, 2013 by Leta

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I’ve seen plenty of Tori Amos concerts. Unfortunately, I’ve lost count, but the number is somewhere in the 20s at this point. But it is not enough!! I read about Ears With Feet (Tori fans) who have been to 100 concerts, or who have saved up a bunch of money, taken a leave of absence from work, and followed her around the world, and instead of having the reaction of a normal human, I think, “Oh, wow, I want to do that. A year of seventy Tori concerts? Are you kidding me? Yesssssss. All the yeses ever to yes!”

The issue? Money, job, responsibilities. If I ever get to do this, I’m sure it will be after my daughter is grown. Maybe she’d even want to come with me. If not, though, I’m pretty sure I could convince my BFF will come along for the ride.

If I were to rate the likelihood of any particular one of these, I’d have to admit this one is pretty low in terms of chances. It’s the sort of thing a person can maybe pull off in their early twenties, but as life creeps in, it becomes more and more difficult to make time for something like this. Perhaps it would make more sense if people understood that Tori Amos concerts are my church. There is literally no other time that I feel so completely connected to the universal, so in touch with my heart and spirit and soul, so uplifted and moved. There’s nothing that even touches it.

Before I die, I’d like to follow my church around the world, experiencing the service in far away lands.

Filed Under: Music, Travel, Wishes Tagged With: church, ears with feet, far away lands, tori amos

Fill This Hole

May 6, 2013 by Leta

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I was thinking about this thing with Amazon and their attempt to de-smut their company. Is there any independent site out there set up for people to sell their smutty books without hoops to jump through? I know that Smashwords allows the sale of all kinds of smutty smut, even the stuff Amazon won’t allow, but the buyer has to opt into the Adult Filter in order to see said books. I’m curious if there is a site out there similar to Smashwords or Bandcamp for independent music where the author/publisher can upload their trashy smut and not have to worry about censorship of searches? And if not, then that seems a niche that needs filled, guys.

Someone please provide me a link to such a resource? Or someone please go make this store a reality? I think you’ll make some money for sure. Oh, indeed.

ETA: Apparently, rumor has it, one very excellent and well-known erotica writer is going to make this a reality! Whoot!

Filed Under: books, Reading, Sex Tagged With: adult filter, amazon, bandcamp, erotica, kindle, smashwords, smut

Fanworks Friday: Icons on LJ — A Soon To Be Lost Art?

May 3, 2013 by Leta

Now that Tumblr is taking over fandom, the small 100×100 pictures known as icons or avatars on LiveJournal seem to be losing importance. There was a time when icons were an art in and of themselves with entire communities dedicated to them. Now it seems they’ve fallen prey to Tumlbr, too.

Icon Addicts
Fandom Icons

A few samples:

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by atoms_vibrating

18jBXzrby_booshsploosh

by booshsploosh

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by winterfel

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by thefixedfoot

FKWxYRd_by_tricksterings

by tricksterings

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by ever_maedhros

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by ever_maedhros

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by tricksterings

Filed Under: Art, Fandom, Fanwork Friday Tagged With: 100x100, icons, livejournal, tumblr

Roses, Hooray!

May 2, 2013 by Leta

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Filed Under: Photos Tagged With: roses

Erotic Writing under Attack by Amazon?

May 1, 2013 by Leta

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Pinterest is also in the morality game. They removed this pin from my account on the basis of “nudity”. I suppose it is the fringe of pubes and the side view of half a buttocks that flagged their inappropriate-o-meter? Because a man who looks as though he’s dancing, seems hardly inappropriate in a world that isn’t terrified of nudity. I wonder, if it was a painting, would it have received the same treatment?

Selena Kitts, a well-known writer of raunchy “pornography”, has written an interesting post called Survival Tips for the Pornocolypse (Erotica Writers Get Armed and Ready). It was of interest to me for two reasons. One, I write romantica under the pen name Leta Blake. You can find links to my books anywhere on this page, but to make it easy for you, here. Two, I write some really raunchy erotica under another Super Top Secret Pen Name. I do it mainly for fun and to blow off steam, and to feel like I’m giving the finger to some of the issues I have with traditional and e-publishing, but I wouldn’t say I’m doing it to make a ton of money. However, I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to make some money from the endeavor. Otherwise I’m just throwing away time and money on covers, etc.

There were many things I found interesting about Selena Kitt’s post. I almost don’t know where to start. I suppose I could break this down into a few posts to make it more digestible. Perhaps I will. Let me start at the beginning of her post and respond as I go.

First, off, kudos, Selena, on having such an attractive site for your porn. I know this sounds like I’m being facetious, but I’m serious. It’s very nice and it would definitely encourage me to click on something and possibly buy it. One day, when I’ve got more to offer, I want to have a site like yours!

The Pornocalypse has begun. Amazon continues filtering erotica out of their All Department Search in large numbers. Don’t stick your head in the sand and think it’s going to all go away. By then, it may be too late.

I’ve noticed the books I’ve published under Super Top Secret Pen Name do not show up under the All Department Search. I’ve never entirely decided how I feel about that. I suspect some of the roads my brain has taken on this issue are similar to the roads taken by Amazon itself while other thoughts diverge. I usually start out frustrated because if someone is searching for erotica books featuring a cheerleader losing her virginity to her step-brother (as a completely made up example, I didn’t write a book like that–yet), then they should be able to find one without having to jump through extra hoops. Right now, if I go to the Amazon home page and type “Cheerleader loses virginity to step-brother”, I get a result back that says, “No products match your search.” I know damn well that’s not true, but only because I know that damn well. If I was your Average Joe Internet User, I might think, “Oh, well, I guess there are no books for me to buy like that.” But, if I go to the Kindle Book Department and type in the same search, I end up with this small, but existing, selection of titles. No perfect match, but there are some dirty books there all the same. Hooray for dirty books!

I suspect that the next thought many of you are going to have is similar to mine and probably the main motivating thought of Amazon and those who encourage its policies. Won’t someone think of the children!?!?! In the days of books and mortar stores, the dirty books would be housed either in a separate room, away from children’s eyes, in a separate store altogether, or covered in dark plastic to keep them from looking. Amazon is likely trying to do the same thing. But even in the days of books and mortar stores, I always took the position that it is the parents’ job to police what their kids are reading, not the stores’ job to police what they kids have access to within the store. Does the internet make that a ton harder to accomplish? Hell yes, but it doesn’t shift the onus onto the stores necessarily.

I do recall not too long ago, I was looking up a children’s book recommended to me by a friend. My search on Amazon brought up two results. One was the book I wanted and the other was titled something very similar and looked like a possible sequel. I opened it up to read about the book, and it was, to my surprise and amusement, an utterly filthy rape erotica story and not a sequel at all. In that moment, I though, “Oh, there are going to be Christian crazies all over this shit before long.” I have no doubt that kind of thing played a role in what is happening at Amazon.

[ETA: Interestingly enough, if I search Amazon’s main search page for various raunchy dirty books while I am not logged in to my account, I find a much wider selection of offerings. And I find that curious under the Won’t Someone Think of the Children argument, since kids are much less likely to have their own accounts than bonafide grown-ups. So, why would the search be more liberal for people without accounts than those with accounts? Curious.]

Still, my next thought is, okay, fine, thinking of the children and all, what’s the harm in moving these books out of the line of sight? They’re still there and a user who really wants to read about cheerleaders sleeping with their step-brothers can still find those books if they work hard enough. It’s only two extra clicks to be able to find the books you want!

And yet it does seem to make a difference in sales. Is that a good thing? Or a bad thing? Are we reducing the number of sales to 14 year olds whose Mommy and Daddy don’t do spot checks of their e-book readers? Or are we reducing the number of sales to full-fledged adults who don’t know they have to make these two extra clicks to get what they want? I suspect it’s a bit of both, but more of the second. There’s no where on the Amazon site where they say, “Oh, psst, you can still find your dirty books! You just need to work harder at it!”

Uh, back to Selena’s post. I’m rambling and possibly getting ahead of myself here.

The fact remains—the dirty secret that drives technology? It’s “porn.” Erotica, as a genre, has been Amazon’s dirty little secret from the beginning, driving sales of the Kindle to astronomical numbers. Does Amazon really believe that it was all the free copies of “Huckleberry Finn” and “Moby Dick” (Moby Duck on Apple?) that drove readers to buy Kindle devices? Nope, sorry. It was erotica. It was “porn.”

Jeff Bezos may have put out the product, but I made the Kindle into what it is today. Me, and legions of other erotica writers who were already writing it, and those who came later, who saw how much readers were clamoring for it. Readers could suddenly read erotica without anyone seeing the cover. The Kindle device made that possible, Amazon made the Kindle available… but I provided the content readers were surreptitiously reading under their desks at work and on the subway home.

Erotica writers made the Kindle what it is today. Not mystery writers, not horror writers, not even romance writers. Certainly not big publishing, who have been brought kicking and screaming into the ebook world. It was erotica writers who provided readers with the titillating books that made this new device so convenient and advantageous. So you could carry 500 books at a time… big deal, who’s going to read 500 books while you’re at the doctor’s office? But women everywhere realized they could read sexual fantasies, stories about BDSM, about dubious consent, about sex toys and infidelity, all those fantasies that we know women have been having since Nancy Friday wrote Secret Garden, and they could do it without anyone knowing, at the doctor’s office or in line at the supermarket.

THAT is what sold Kindles. Porn. Face it, Jeff Bezos. You owe the success of Kindle to me, and to every erotica writer out there making a living writing “porn.”

And what thanks do we get? None. Other writers (ala Konrath and Crouch and Bella Andre—the latter whose books are just as “dirty” or “porny” as some that have been relegated to the ghetto behind the ADULT filter) get special treatment from Amazon. They get spotlights and highlights. They get mentioned in Amazon newsletters.

Erotica writers get stepped on. We get shoved into a corner, we get relegated to back rooms and top shelves. We get “filtered.” Now, before you say, “But come ON! This is ADULT material, shouldn’t it be targeted just to ADULTS?”—my answer to that is “yes!” I don’t expect Amazon to highlight erotica writers in mainstream newsletters or even to highlight us at all (although if they were smart, they would… we make them a lot of money. A LOT of money. They should target us to readers they know read us… it only makes sense!) but I DO expect them to treat us with transparency and good business ethics.

She’s right, you realize. I mean, to a degree, she’s right. My mother has purchased thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of Kindle books. What are most of them? Erotica and romantica. She’s admitted that she loves the dirtiest stuff she can find on Kindle because no one ever has to know she’s read it. My mother is sixty-six years old. Who is Amazon to try to make it harder for her to read her books? And did the two additional clicks make a difference to her? You bet it did. She didn’t even know she had to make some additional clicks. She’d stopped buying from Amazon and switched to Smashwords and other online sources because Amazon had stopped carrying her dirty books. Or so she thought. How many other perfectly legal grown-ups also faced this?

And Selena Kitts makes a really good point. If Amazon actually marketed filth to those who like to read filth, they could make good money doing so. Why is it their business model to fail to do so? I assume we could say that it’s stand-up morality. But I’m pretty sure it’s stand-up stupidity. Or possibly fear. What, I wonder, are they afraid of? (Hell, probably. Oh, hell, you shiny, dark stinkhole of fear.)

The filtering tool that Amazon previously only used to exclude nudity on covers is now being applied to books arbitrarily, but in very, very large numbers. We haven’t seen a purge this big on Amazon since they banned incest and bestiality in erotic work.

First of all, Amazon has now separated Erotica and Romance. I don’t know if erotic romance writers know this or have realized it yet, but Amazon has recently changed their policy (not that they’ve told anyone about it or anything!) and you can no longer put your book in BOTH Erotica and Romance categories. You have to choose one or the other. “Erotic Romance” as a category will now classify your book as “erotica.”

And be careful, because once you have labeled your book as “erotic,” they will not allow you to reclassify it as NOT erotic. The only exception to this rule I have seen so far is for traditionally published books (ala Fifty Shades). Self-published books don’t get this treatment.

Now this? This is problematic. And revealing. There is money here, more money than they care to lose. Because Fifty Shades, while terribly written in many ways (sorry!), is just as porny as a ton of the stuff they’ve filtered. Maybe more so.

How do you avoid being filtered?

Keep nudity off your cover. Also keep it out of the inside of your book.
Keep your titles and keywords free of the “Amazon Bad Words List” below. Amazon’s current policy could be summed up in this way—if you dress up pretty on the outside, you can be as much of a whore on the inside as you like.
The “Amazon Bad Word List”

(who else is thinking about George Carlin right now?)

(And if you know of more words or things that are being banned, please go ahead and add to the list in the comments, or better yet, post it over on Banned Erotic Books on Facebook!)

Nudity on covers (this rule changes a lot – thongs are ok so far. “Hand bras” are not ok, i.e. a nude woman with her or someone else’s hands covering her breasts).
Incest is banned altogether. But pseudo-incest will get you filtered. Anything with obvious titles, especially “Daddy” and “Mommy,” but also sister, brother, siblings, uncle, family, etc.
Gangbang, rape, reluctant, reluctance, nonconsent, dubious consent (dubcon), forced, or “rough” sex, strap-on – careful BDSM folks, keep an eye out, because they may come after that next.
Breeding, bred or impregnation stories
Any profanity or obscene language: pussy, cock, cum, tits, fuck, sex, clit, etc. (Now I really feel like George Carlin…)
Lactation, breastfeeding, lactating, milky
Tentacles and other mythological creatures (minotaurs, centaurs, bigfoot, etc.)

I’m not at all sure what Selena is suggesting here. Is she suggesting that these changes only be made to the cover, title, blurb, etc? Or is she suggesting that these changes be made to books themselves. I’m going too assume she means the former and not the later because otherwise the books would be censored.

I am not sure, though, I think doing as she suggests is a good idea? If authors of the raunchy erotica/porn follow these suggestions, then how will their books ever be found? Porn readers want to know what they’re buying before they buy it. In fact, up until now, the suggested way of doing the entire raunchy porn book thing was the exact opposite of these suggestions. The advice my Super Top Secret Pen Name received when she began was:

a) make the title very obvious so people can find what they are looking for. If it is about having sex with an alien from another world, then title it something like, “Alien Tentacle Sex” or “Bred by Aliens” or whatever.

b) make the cover very sexy/obvious so people know, yes, this is the porn I seek.

c) use tag words when uploading that make it easy for the person to find the porn they want to read.

d) use the blurb area to be descriptive of the contents so people are very aware of what they are buying. Describe the sex acts within and mark it as 18+.

Now, Selena is advising that we not do these things, and I understand why she’s saying that. At the same time, readers like to know what they are getting and I don’t think people who can’t figure out that they can find what they are looking for by clicking two more times into the Kindle store are going to be able to figure out that a book called “Professor’s New Suit”, in which the blurb reads, “In a dressing room of a high end department store, meeting with a tailor who happens to be a former student, the professor’s full measure is taken and he gets something unexpected in return” is, in fact, all about dirty gay sex in a dressing room between a professor and his former student. Well, maybe they would. Who knows? But it seems more likely that “Banging My Professor” will be what someone looking for erotica about Professor/Student is going to search for. Covering it up in order to avoid Amazon’s filter doesn’t seem any more likely to bring sales than just letting it sit with its original filthy name under the Adult filter. Thoughts on that?

I suppose what most bothers me about this entire situation is the fact that Amazon made/makes a ton of money from these kinds of stories, and clearly capitulates to the likes of 50 Shades of Grey, and yet screws over the little guy making a buck. I suppose my main question is why?

Weirdly enough, because I know that the majority of people buying these books are women, I feel the reins of misogyny pulling at me when I hear about this kind of thing. Women are reading things that men don’t want them reading, that society doesn’t want them reading, and as their minds are getting free, along comes a big company, run by a man, who wants to put the brakes on it at the very least, and maybe introduce the idea of some non-sexy shackles. Gotta control access to the vagina, y’all. Gotta keep the women from getting ideas about their vag and what they might do with it! It’s for their own good, of course.

Additional reading:

1. “As fellow author, Will Belegon, noted, if Amazon is going to start pulling books with incest in them: “I just re-read Genesis 19: 30-38 and realized that Lot’s daughters got him drunk, had sex with him and bore sons. I demand you follow your clear precedent and remove The Bible from Kindle.”

Or perhaps Amazon should create a new television ad after they follow their clear precedent and ban the book the woman is reading in the advertisement on her Kindle (“Sleepwalking” by Amy Bloom) which tells the story of a 19-year-old boy who has a sexual encounter with his stepmother, which, in some states, is legally incest.”

2. The Dirty Secret that Drives Technology

3. Kindlerotica: The strange but inevitable rise of e-reader pornography. — Proving Selena right that the Kindle was driven by written pornography sales.

4. Salacious Content Driving E-book Sales

Filed Under: Reading, Sex, Words Tagged With: adult filter, amazon, banning, books, erotica, how to market porn writing, incest, kindle, porn, pornography, pseudo-incest, selena kitts, sexism, two more clicks

Writer Wednesday: Winter Chill by Aria Grace & J.J. Hunter

May 1, 2013 by Leta

What are your names? And tell us a little about yourselves?
I: My name is Indie Walker and I’m a freshman and Plymouth State University. I play for the basketball team and am studying business.This is my roommate and best friend Daniel Barnes.  Daniel is one of the rising stars of the wresting team.
D: Well, rising star is a bit generous but we’ve had a good season. I haven’t declared a major yet but my dad wants me to take over his construction business one day so I’ve been taking business classes. Although, I like the accounting classes so I might focus there. There have been a lot of changes in my life this year so I’m not sure yet about career directions.

 

How did you meet? Was it love at first sight?

I: Oh, um, well, we’ve been roommates for the past 7 months and only recently took it, um, well further.
D: What he means is that although we were best friends, it took us a while to come out to each other. We aren’t fully out at school but some of our close friends and family know we’re together. I’m glad it wasn’t love at first sight because I think we’re closer having built a friendship first. He knows all my secrets and still…loves me. It’s pretty awesome.

 

If it wasn’t love at first sight, what changed?

 

I: For me, it changed when I realized that I always wanted to be with him. After a cold weekend and a few great days hanging out together, when we were finally separated it sucked. I couldn’t eat or sleep or function without him. I guess that sounds stupid.
D: Same for me. I was more worried about what my dad would think than what I wanted so I tried to distance myself from Indie but I couldn’t. The pull to him was unlike anything I’ve ever felt.


What is your best & worst qualities? What about his?

I: My worst quality is that I spend too much time in my head. Analyzing situations and thinking the worst. I need to stop that. My best, I dunno. Maybe my jump shot?
D: You’re such a dork. Your best quality is that you’re caring of others above yourself. That might also be your worst. My worst is definitely that I care too much about what other people think. But, I’m getting over that. My best…probably my abs.

 

If you could have one wish come true, what would it be and why?

I: I think mine already has. I never expected to fall in love and be so happy. I’m not sure what else I’d ask for.
D: You stole mine. But, I’ll take it even further. I think my wish is that we’ll be able to live freely without worrying about what other people think of us. I want everyone to be as happy as we are, but even if they aren’t I wish they would stop trying to interfere with our happiness.

***

Aria, tell us a little about yourself!

I am a brand new author, just trying to figure out the ins and outs of storytelling. I have a long way to go before I’m great but my fans have been so supportive and encouraging that I am always so excited to publish the next book. I live in California with my husband and family. We like  outdoor sports and swimming with the dogs. When I’m not writing or with the kids, you can usually find me curled up around my ipad reading one of 500 books in my TBR list.

 

What makes your current offering a different and compelling read?

 

This book is different because it was a collaboration with another new author. He really inspired much of the story and made the descriptions much more vivid than I could have come up with. I think most people will agree that it’s the best one I’ve put out so far. Hopefully, we’ll be collaborating again because it was a really fun process.


What is the most rewarding aspect of writing and/or publishing? The most terrifying/frustrating?

The most rewarding part of self-publishing is the instant gratification. I can finish a book, have it formatted and be seeing sales within 3 days. It’s a pretty amazing process. The most terrifying part is getting feedback from readers. In general, readers have been very supportive and most feedback has been constructive. However, getting a really bad review or being called out on an error that you agree with is humbling and can create some doubt about whether I should keep doing it. But, all in all, it’s been so much fun to create characters and situations that can provide some happiness and entertainment for readers. My promise to every reader is that I’m actively trying to get better with every book so if you stick with me…it’ll be worth the ride.

 

Winter Chill: Novella of First Time Love 

Indie Walker started college with a basketball scholarship and a plan to stay focused on his studies. His roommate and best friend, Daniel, is one of the most popular guys on the wrestling team. When a power outage during a winter storm forces them to get closer than ever before just to survive the night, their relationship changes forever. Neither are gay but the physical chemistry they have is undeniable. Unfortunately, Daniel’s issues at home might be too severe for them to overcome.

Buy now at:
amazon: 

smash:

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: aria grace, gay for you, gay men, gay romance, novella, winter chill, writer wednesday

4 – Twenty Five Things Tuesday: Will Write For Food

April 30, 2013 by Leta

write

Before I die, I want to earn my living writing books. Here’s the interesting thing, when it comes to this part of what I want to do before I die, I’m not sure that I care too terribly what kind of books they are. I don’t care if they are smut or deeply good, important books. I just want to make my living by writing them. Before I die. So, sometime in the next sixty years if I am lucky.

Filed Under: How to be a better person, Wishes, Words Tagged With: 25 things before death, 25 things tuesday, before I die I want to earn my living writing, earn a living writing, writing

Fear & Barebacking Research

April 29, 2013 by Leta

Barebacking-Cal-AIDS-Flier_thumb[1]

“The terrible thing in this world is that everyone has his reasons.”
Octave, The Rules of the Game, Jean Renoir, 1939

I just finished a short story that I’ll be submitting for a call at the end of May. I’ve still got some editing to do of the draft, but I’m in a place where I think, or hope rather, that I’ll be able to get it done in time.

The story was inspired by some research I did into fear and barebacking culture awhile ago. I don’t know if you could look at this story and from the outside see that that the inspiration came from researching risky sex within the gay community, and specifically the barebacking community. It’s definitely got elements of risky sex in it, but the choices made do not seem to have much to do with barebacking on the surface.

Still, the question of what drives people to make choices that seem to endanger them in some way is one that I found fascinating and which informed this story. With that in mind, I’m going to share a few of the readings I found had the most impact on this story and on my ideas about fear. I am not in any way claiming that I agree with any of the statements below. They only served to inspire aspects of the story and nothing more.

1. Another of the men interviewed by Carballo-Dieguez, illustrates the points that Crossley makes about the power of barebacking as a transgressive act. It is exhilarating, it is the forbidden thing, it is like a drug, it is what you are not supposed to do, it’s getting away with murder. — Why Do Men Bareback? No Easy Answers.

2. One of the ways that internalized homophobia may play out is an unconscious sense that the individual is unimportant, undervalued, and not worth very much, thus increasing his sense that he is expendable, and so too are the men with whom he has sex and from whom he seeks love and validation.

“What we have learned from Roland Barthes as from Michel Foucault and Oscar Wilde (albeit differently in each case) is that oppression inheres in those subjected to it as their or our identity, and must eventually be experienced and contested there, and never more so than when this subjection involves desire. Identity for the homosexual is always conflicted: at once ascribed, proscribed, and internalized, it is in terms of identity that self-hatred, violence, mutilation, and death have been suffered” (Dollimore, 1998, pp. 325-326).

Los Angeles writer and therapist Douglas Sadownick notes that “sex often is a matter for the unconscious”

One of the basic tenets of psychoanalytic theory that Freud (1920) formulated concerns sexuality overlapping with a dimension of negativity. Freud originally called it “the death instinct,” but is now commonly referred to as “the death drive.”

In short, taking the risks associated with barebacking is actually the way some gay men are trying to take care of themselves and meet deep and urgent needs and desires.

3. Tim Dean (2000) writes: “Most people can’t comprehend why anyone would risk death for a good fuck. From a certain viewpoint, unsafe sex appears as inconceivably self-destructive behavior. Indeed, while such health-threatening practices as smoking, drinking, and drug abuse must be indulged in repeatedly over a substantial period before they are likely to cause harm, HIV infection can result from a single unprotected encounter. Casual, anonymous sex without a condom seems suicidal” (p. 139). But the long-term effects of HIV infection on health are easily denied when faced with the immediacy of sexual pleasure, particularly if one is using drugs that fog one’s judgment. — Why Do Men Bareback? No Easy Answers.

4. Vincke and colleagues (2001) found that “the incorporation of semen is an important value for many in gay cultures, a means of showing devotion, belonging, and oneness. Unsafe sex can therefore be an expression of positive values and of good feelings” (p. 58). There is something deeply erotic, profoundly connecting and, some feel, even sacred about one person giving his most private and special fluid, semen, to the other as a gift of love and a symbolic joining of two souls. The many levels of meaning and special significance that giving and receiving of semen has for gay men cannot be underestimated as a contributing factor to the rise in barebacking — especially in romantic couples,

Some have described drinking semen as literally ingesting the vitality, strength, manliness, or very essence of the man whose semen they either drank or received anally. There are men who feel that sharing their own or receiving the semen of a lover is a visceral as well as symbolic gift of love or a spiritual communion. There are those who revel in experiencing the esthetic and sensual pleasures in giving or receiving semen. By no means is this a comprehensive list. The meaning of sharing semen between two men is as varied as the men who engage in this act. — Why Do Men Bareback? No Easy Answers.

5. Our minds are conditioned – that is an obvious fact – conditioned by the culture, the society, influenced by various impressions, strains, stresses, relationships, economic, social, climatic, educational, religious conformity, sanctions and so on. And our minds are trained to accept fear and escape, if we can, from that fear, never being able to resolve, totally and completely, the whole nature and structure of fear. So our first question is: whether the mind, so heavily burdened, can resolve completely, not only its conditioning, but also its fears? Because it is the fear that makes us accept conditioning.

So, can the mind actually ever be free of fear? That seems to me to be one of the most primary, essential, questions which must be asked and which must be resolved, for any person who is at all serious. There are physical fears and psychological fears. The physical fears of pain, having had pain and the repetition of that pain in the future; the fears of old age, death, the fears of physical insecurity, the fears of uncertainties of tomorrow, the fears of not being able to be a great success, achieve and so on, not being somebody in this rather ugly world; the fears of destruction, the fears of loneliness, not being able to love or be loved, and so on; the conscious fears as well as the unconscious fears. Can the mind be free, totally, of all this? And if it cannot, then such a mind is incapable, because it is distorted, it is incapable of perception, of understanding, of having a mind that is completely silent, quiet; it is like a blind man seeking light and never finding light, and therefore inventing a ‘light’ of words, concepts, theories.

So how is a mind which is so heavily burdened with fear, and with all its conditioning, ever to be free of it? Or must we accept it as an inevitable thing of life? – and most of us do accept it, put up with it.

So, now what shall we do? How shall I, as a human being, and you as a human being, be rid of this fear, the total fear, not a particular fear, but the whole nature and structure of fear? — To Be Human, J. Krishnamurti

Filed Under: Research, Sex Tagged With: barebacking, fear, freedom, gay sex, research, risk taking, sexual choices, writing research

Three Songs of the Month

April 25, 2013 by Leta

Music-on-World-off

I’ve been sort of obsessing over three songs the last few weeks. Thought I’d share.


This world. This song.


Learn from us very much, look at us but do not touch.


Was it something I said? I know that it was something I said.

Filed Under: Music, Video Tagged With: go slow, haim, laughing with, lee hazelwood, nancy sinatra, regina, regina spektor, some velvet morning

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